August 12, 2010

View From the Backseat...

     In the middle of about the 6th or 7th hour of a stupidly long 12 hour drive to Michigan last week, I had some thoughts. These thoughts came while my wife was napping in the back seat and the Bearded Boy was yelling at passing cars in the passenger seat...how I was able to even generate coherent thoughts, I have no idea.
     I was thinking back about 15 or 16 years (my timing is probably way off actually, I always recall things as if I was 11 or 12...it was a busy year apparently). Around that time, again not exactly sure of the year, my parents, brother, and I took our first trip along Lake Michigan...which subsequently was the trip that started a trend of so many trips to Lake Michigan after that. This first trip was special though and it sticks in my mind to this day.  We started way up north near Mackinaw City and made our way down the west coast of Michigan, all the way down to just about Indiana...all the while catching glimpses of the Lake as we drove and stopping in tiny lakeside cities to enjoy fudge, pasties, and rocks (Michigan stuff). There were good memories to be had on that trip, but I think what resonates with me (and what I was thinking about on OUR drive up to Michigan) is the backseat of the car. Stick with me here. Those memories from the backseat are so special to me...the view is different from the back. The feelings of being safe, with Dad driving and Mom navigating...they knew where we were headed, I didn't have to worry about that. Feelings of discovery, every mile or so being able to see something new from our back windows...the Lake, towns, cows, more rocks...everything was exciting from the backseat. The backseat was my bro and I's home for a week, it was our place... it was safe, it was comfortable, it was my youth. Which brings me to the present...
     So, here I am, driving my newly formed family (my wife and I...and brother) up to the place where years ago, my family drove me. I got to thinking about how I was driving my family 12 hours north to go on vacation...and how I had never done that before. I was always the one in the backseat, enjoying the view...being the kid. I got to thinking about how I will rarely, probably never, be the backseat dweller again. For the rest of my life, I'll be the driver...I'll be the man...and eventually the dad, driving my wife and kids to...wherever.
     It made me a little sad at first, to be honest. I mean, it was one of those thoughts that lets you know that you'll never be a kid again. I'll never again get to experience the feeling of just hopping into the backseat without really caring what highway we're taking or how we're getting there, but rather being more worried with where lunch will be or if Mom packed my drawing pencils. I'll never again be able to fall asleep while the car is in motion, hearing my parent's whispers in the front seat...waking up at the next stop to get lunch (that I don't have to pay for). So yeah, it made me a little sad...it's always a little sobering when you realize that you can't go back.
    But then I had another thought...and it made me happy and excited. It was a small thought, but it went something like this...'Your backseat days are over, yes, but your kids will one day be grateful that YOU are in the front seat, leading them on.' Such a great thought. What a great thing it will be when one day Janele and I can give our kids memories like the ones that I have today. When I can drive our family to Michigan, or Florida, or Oregon, or wherever we decide to go. My job now is to let OUR kids have the backseat, to let THEM have memories and feel safe and be excited (though I still get REALLY excited when we're leaving for vacation, don't get me wrong). What a privilage it is to be handed the responsibility of building memories for your family. It makes me look forward to one day being a dad and being able to take my family on adventures. Janele and I will get to give our children a really special thing in that we'll be able to give them amazing memories, just as we've been given from our parents.
      Maybe our kids will have memories when they're adults of seeing the world's largest cherry pie, or of dad screaming from the front seat because a bee has stung his face, or of mom whispering little things like, "Honey...what mile marker do you want to drop the kids off at?" It's all up to us, the memories that we provide our children are in our hands...and it's an immense responsibility and privilage, but one that I am extremely happy to take on and look forward to doing well.

- the Hubs


C'mon kids...hop in!!

4 comments:

  1. I like this post, Steve. You'll be a great vacation-dad, probably the kind that does goofy things and embarrasses your kids. (and there is also one very amusing typo... might want to edit that).

    ReplyDelete
  2. Thanks Nikki!!! And, a clarification...pasties as referred to here in this post are NOT the stuff of scantily clad weirdos...pasties (pronounced: 'pass-tees') are a Northern Michigan food specialty, it's kind of a hand-held pot pie. :)

    ReplyDelete
  3. I love you....and you'll never know how true this really is until you're carrying your precious ones in the back seat :)

    Momma

    ReplyDelete